Rachel Bublitz

Writer

Research

Research time!

I’ve spent February interviewing some of the men in my life, and those conversations have been SO HELPFUL that I’ve decided to throw a wider net. If you identify as male, and are between the ages of 25-40, please help me out and fill out my survey. It’s for art! And it’s so simple, just follow this link:

MAN DUDE BRO Play Questionnaire

The play will not be called MAN DUDE BRO, that’s a working title (at least I hope).

Thanks to everyone who participates! Feel free to forward to all the fellas you know!

New Teaching Adventure

The contract has been signed, tons of paperwork filled out, I even taught a class this morning, and so I finally am comfortable spilling the beans in which I’ve been scared I’d somehow jinx; I’m the newest adjunct professor for Weber State University! One of their professors couldn’t finish the semester, and so I was asked to step in and (pretty much) save the day. The class I’ll be teaching is an Introduction to Theater class, and I’ll be doing a lot of learning on my feet. Today wasn’t too rough, but we mostly did playwriting exercises, something I have some experience in. I plan on teaching them the Liz Lerman Method of Response (thank you Michelle Carter and Brian Thorstenson!), and a lot of other things which involve theater and plays and all that good stuff (give me a break I was hired five days ago). Learning! So much learning! Hopefully not just me learning!

And this isn’t changing any of my previously stated goals, still writing 6 plays this year. I’ll just be a whole lot more busy than I had originally planned.

I’m also teaching a night class twice a month to Egyptian Theatre Junior Conservatory, so party party!

I’m pretty sure that I’ve got this, but I’ll report back by the end of April. Hey, good thing I got those graduate degrees! And if anyone out there has teaching advice please, please, please send it my way.

My Next Play for 2017

Still not quite ready for the big-big news (check back tomorrow for that), but since NO MAP has a draft out it’s time for me to start working on my next full length play for the year. And for that I’m going to be bothering some of you. My next full length is a yet-to-be-titled play about guys and friendship and male body image. I have yet to write a full length with only male characters, and so I expect this to be quite the exciting/terrifying challenge, which brings me to you… I have questions, research for the upcoming play, and I need your answers. You as in the dudes who read this. If you are a dude or a bro or a guy or all of the above, expect to hear from me. I’m planning on taking folks out for coffee and asking them questions, or bothering you over the phone, or as a last resort over email or possibly through an online survey if I can figure that out. Anyway, you should expect me and my (probably) painless questions. AND if you don’t hear from me but want in on this super fun interview/research stuff, email me, I’d love to hear from you: Rnbublitz@gmail.com

THANKS!

January 2017 Submission Tally

One month of 2017 is over and we’re (mostly) still here. I was busy all last month trying to push out my first draft of NO MAP, (which I did!) but I also filled any down time with sending plays out to folks. I don’t have an exact goal for submissions this year, with writing six new full-length I wanted to give myself a break on submissions if I needed it. But if the rest of the year goes like January, I won’t need a break; after crunching the numbers looks like I sent forty two scripts last month. FORTY TWO.

I am a firm believer than no matter how good you are at writing, getting things picked up is a game of numbers. The more you send out, the more chances you have to get in. So I’m really hoping to keep up this momentum all year.

And I have another big thing on the horizon! A new opportunity popped up yesterday that I’m over-the-moon about. I can’t say yet because things aren’t official, but I will say that it looks like I’m about to be very very busy. Make sure to look out for the exciting news next week!

All right, let’s do this February!

First Draft of NO MAP Complete

Just typed my favorite three words, “end of play,” on my first draft of NO MAP! It is probably the biggest mess of a first draft I’ve ever written, but it’s finished and I never have to write the first draft of this play again. I’ve been wanting to write a road trip play for a while now, and while I know it needs a fun-ton of work to get it in any kind of submission ready shape, I’m proud that I got this one out because this play that fought me the whole freaking time. Now to find some kind souls who can lend me their vocal talents for a few hours so I can find out just how much of a hot-mess it really is.

One out of six plays down for 2017! BOOM!

Last Night’s RIPPED Reading at Salt Lake Acting Company

Last night Salt Lake Acting Company hosted an in-house reading of RIPPED. It was part of their Starving Students program, which by the way, if you’re a student in the area you should be 100% taking advantage of this program; it includes discount tickets to show (super discounted), as well as master classes throughout the semester. Last night was one of those master classes, the students all got the script ahead of time and showed up ready to read. We drew names out of a hat to get our actors and dove right in.

For a cold read of not the easiest script, in regards to content as well as how much the main character talks, they nailed it. I was so impressed! Something that I’d not thought of before was how much having age appropriate actors in the roles would affect the script. I’ve always used mid-twenty to thirty-ish aged actors who looked younger, and never thought twice about it. But seeing people barely out of their teens, people who are still forming into adults, bump into one another through the the story was heartbreaking and made the point of the play hit much harder. Following the reading we had a discussion and they impressed me all over again with their questions ranging from specifics about the play to process and craft. It was helpful to hear how close this play hit to home with them. Basically I’m saying it was a fantastic night and if this is how Salt Lake Company rolls, I can’t wait for another chance to work with them.

I’m not sure what’s next for RIPPED, for now I’ll keep sending it out like a crazy woman because I believe it’s a play people need to see. And don’t worry, as soon as it’s something that you can see, I’ll be sure to let you know all about it.

MY BODY a Short Political Play

I wrote MY BODY back in 2012 for an evening benefitting Planned Parenthood hosted by Playwrights’ Center of San Francisco called Repro Rights!. It went on to be performed around the country and is currently published in Smith and Kraus’ The Best Ten-Minute Plays 2014 ten-minute play anthology.

MY BODY by Rachel Bublitz

CHARACTERS:

Laura, female, 35-55, has an authoritative presence.

Patrick, male, 28-35.

Sally, female, 20-30.

LAURA’s government office. LAURA is on stage. LAURA presses the button on her intercom.

LAURA

Sally, please send in my next appointment.

PATRICK enters. PATRICK wears a robotic looking collar around his neck.

LAURA (CONTINUED)

Good afternoon, my name is Laura Goodman. I’ll be reviewing your case today.

PATRICK

Good afternoon.

LAURA

You want approval for the permanent removal of your collar, correct?

PATRICK

Yes ma’am.

LAURA

And you have all of your paperwork in order?

PATRICK

Yes ma’am, it’s all there.

LAURA

Please sit down. It’s nice to see such a young man with his priorities straight. Well, hand over your paperwork.

PATRICK hands LAURA a thick questionnaire. LAURA reads through it.

PATRICK

I’ve included three letters of recommendation, instead the minimum of two.

LAURA

I see, very nice. Patrick Hill, is it?

PATRICK

Yes.

LAURA

This is very well organized. I can tell that you took the time. You’d be amazed at how many botched applications I get in here everyday.

PATRICK

I can only imagine.

LAURA turns the first page and begins to read the second page.

LAURA

Steady income, you’ve been teaching for seven years?

PATRICK

That’s correct.

LAURA

What grade do you teach?

PATRICK

Second grade.

LAURA

Like the little ones, do you?

PATRICK

I do.

LAURA

That’s nice. And I see you passed all of the disease screenings.

PATRICK

There were a lot of tests.

LAURA

We’re very serious about what we do here.

PATRICK

I can see that.

LAURA turns to the next page in the paperwork.

LAURA

Oh, there seems to be a mistake here.

PATRICK

There is?

LAURA

Are you married?

PATRICK

No.

LAURA

Engaged?

PATRICK

No.

LAURA

Are you homosexual?

PATRICK

No.

Pause.

LAURA

Is this some sort of practical joke?

PATRICK

I’m sorry?

LAURA

Did Sally put you up to this?

PATRICK

Sally?

LAURA

My assistant. She thinks she has a great sense of humor.

PATRICK

Sally has nothing to do with this. I’m here to have my collar removed.

LAURA

Do you not understand what we do here, Mr. Hill?

PATRICK

I know perfectly well.

LAURA

Then I don’t see how you thought you could just waltz in here without a marriage certificate and think that we’d approve your application.

LAURA opens a drawer to retrieve a “rejected” stamp and proceeds to stamp his application.

PATRICK

I just thought-

LAURA

That your three letters of recommendation would sway me? You obviously underestimated how serious we take collar removal. Please take your application and leave my office. I have serious applications I need to review.

PATRICK

It’s not right.

LAURA

What did you just say?

PATRICK

The collars. It’s not fair.

LAURA

Fair? You’re talking to me about fair? Are you familiar with our figures Mr. Hill? Since collars have been implemented, we’ve eradicated sexually transmitted disease. Rape and sexual abuse is down 99%, and there aren’t any repeat offenders. Molestation is down 98%. These collars make the world a better place.

PATRICK

But at what cost?

LAURA

What cost? Nothing is more important than the safety of the women and children in this country. You should understand that, being a teacher.

PATRICK

I agree that sexual abuse is wrong, but can you really punish the masses for the mistakes of the few?

LAURA

You categorize rape merely as a mistake?

PATRICK

I think rape is wrong, obviously, and-

LAURA

And child molestation? Is that just another mistake to you? What grade do you teach again?

PATRICK

Second. But I would never-

LAURA

I know you wouldn’t. You can’t. For the good of us all.

PATRICK

But I have rights!

LAURA

James 1:14, “But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust has conceived, it brings forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, brings forth death.” Giving into your lust and self satisfying is a sin. Besides, abandoning your seed is an abomination! Child abandonment.

PATRICK

It’s not a child, it’s just… It’s just biological waste.

LAURA

It’s a potential child. Do you know how many unwanted children are born every year in this country?

PATRICK

None.

LAURA

That’s right. Zero. The only country in the world. Children today are born into families that have the resources to care for them. The high school drop out rate is nonexistent, and we are at 100% literacy. A far cry from the archaic ways of our past.

PATRICK

But it’s my body! Don’t I have a say in the matter?

LAURA

Now I know this is a joke. Your body? Are you serious with this rhetoric?

PATRICK

Very serious. It is my body, I have the right to do whatever I want with it.

LAURA

Oh Mr. Hill, it’s much too important a choice for us to let you decide it on your own. I mean, every day, day in and out, it’s just too much of a temptation for men.

PATRICK

I’m an adult! I vote, this is my body! Mine! You can’t tell me what I can and cannot do with it. I demand that you remove my collar. Remove it now! Right now! I can make good choices, I will make good choices. But it’s my body, let me make my own choices!

LAURA

Oh you poor dear. The government has decided that you don’t have the mental capacity to make to follow the correct path on your own, and rightly so. We had to take charge. It’s for your own good.

PATRICK

But-

LAURA

No buts. Just listen. You have been rejected for collar removal today. Unless you want me to call security, I recommend you leave my office. You should know if I do call security I will stamp your application with my “permanently rejected” stamp. Which will make you ineligible for collar removal.

PATRICK

You have the power to permanently reject me?

LAURA

Oh yes, we also have much more permanent methods for containment.

PATRICK

What would… No, you couldn’t.

LAURA

It’s not pretty Patrick. Go on, get out of here. Go and meet a nice girl, come back when you’re settled. You are an excellent candidate, your application was very well organized and we appreciate that. With a wife I’m sure you’ll be approved.

PATRICK

Alright.

LAURA

There’s a good boy. I’m sure a fine looking man such as yourself won’t have a hard time finding a woman.

PATRICK

What? Oh, right. Thanks… It’s torture, what you’re doing. You’re torturing half of the population.

LAURA

I would love to chat, but I really need to get to my next appointment. Thank you for your time.

PATRICK

But-

LAURA

Remember your manners.

PATRICK

I’m sorry for wasting your time. It was nice to meet you too.

PATRICK exits. LAURA pushes the button on her intercom.

LAURA

Sally once you see Mr. Hill out please step into my office.

SALLY enters.

SALLY

Yes?

LAURA

Did Mr. Hill give you any trouble on the way out?

SALLY

No, he just wandered off. He was rejected?

LAURA

He isn’t married, not even engaged.

SALLY

You’re kidding.

LAURA

I thought it was your job to review these applications and weed out the bozos.

SALLY

Laura, they’re men, they’re all bozos.

LAURA

In the future, I expect more professionalism on your part. That application never should have reached my desk.

SALLY

You’re absolutely right, it won’t happen again.

LAURA

You’ll be out of a job if it does, do you hear me?

SALLY

Yes ma’am.

LAURA

Real uppity piece of work that one. Self righteous, you know? He said he wanted control over his body. Like it was his right or something. As if we can trust men to function in society with a working penis.

SALLY

He can’t help it Laura. After all, he’s only a man.

SALLY exits.

End of play.

Fantastic News: Egyptian Theatre Commission! #newplay

Are you ready to hear the fantastic news of the day? Great! Yesterday I signed the contract making a commission from the Egyptian Theatre official! One of the 6 plays I’ll be writing this year will be silly, campy, and packed with girl power, and it’ll be titled: CHEERLEADERS VS ALIENS. Yep, you read right. Cheerleaders fighting aliens. Last year I decided that I wanted to tackle a full length play for high school kids so I starting thinking about a play I’d have liked to have had the option of doing when I was a young theater nerd, and fighting aliens, or playing an alien was the obvious answer.

I’ll be writing the play this Spring with a week long workshop scheduled with the Egyptian Youtheatre for this summer. The play is already scheduled to be produced in the Spring of 2018. Can you imagine? A play that’s still just a thought in my head has been scheduled for production! I’m thrilled and excited and I can’t wait to get to cracking on this sci-fi adventure.

Now with the beans good and spilled I’ve got to get back to writing, don’t know if you noticed but I’m a little busy this year.